Posts technical---or quite simplistic » life

Of Russian cats and server names

dnquark — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 06:00:00 +0000

I name my computers after cats. Not all of them, mind you, and I pick the names carefully. My workhorse servers are Begemot and Matroskin. Today, as I was doing some admin work, I started wondering what I would do if I had to name more machines, given that I'd rather not borrow names from T. S. Eliot.

No other fictional Russian feline can match Begemot or Matroskin in their charisma and/or raw satanic power, but for both of them I found a counterpart of sorts: Vasilii from Monday Begins on Saturday (another talking cat), and Leopold, another cartoon character.

In the process of looking for fictional Russian cats, I stumbled upon a series of Sergei Alimov's magnificent sketches for a never-produced animation feature based on Master and Margarita. This is, in fact, why I'm writing the post.

I am very taken with this simple charcoal rendition of Satan and his cat, black silhouettes overlooking the busy landscape of 1930's Moscow, wondering about the inner world of humans inhabiting the gray communal apartments.

The rest of the sketches are almost equally great, and convey very well the spirit of the book: at times philosophical, at times irreverent, and always just plain hilarious.

The sad state of scientific plotting software

dnquark — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 10:31:11 +0000

It's unfortunate that this blog is turning into rants about scientific computing. Perhaps I am simply ethnically predisposed to doing science and kvetching.

Today's rant is brought about by my collaborators' request to make my paper figures "presentable". The reason is simple -- current figure drafts are straight up Mathematica output, relying mostly on defaults, and they suck. Let's face it -- figures produced by Mathematica can be good, but rarely great, and trying to fine-tune the appearance of frames and axes can be a daunting task.

The problem isn't that Mathematica sucks at plots -- so does most other software. The problem is that to my knowledge there are no reasonable open-source alternatives to something like Origin. So right now, if you are unsatisfied with Mathematica's plotting capabilities, your options come down to this:

- get as far as you easily can with Mathematica, then switch to Illustrator and Photoshop. Pros: guaranteed to work. Cons: time-consuming, labor-intensive, and requires Illustrator, Photoshop, and Windows.

- import data into one of {R, Matlab, Python/Matplotlib} and hope it can do what you are after. Pros: you might get the output you want. Cons: you need to know R, Matlab, or Python.

What shocks me is that in this day and age, it seems that every few years, somebody sits down to write a plotting package, and ends up reinventing the wheel. So you have a bunch of wheels, none perfectly circular; there are all sorts of bumps and protrusions, all in different places. Within R, for instance, there are at least 3 different ways to create plots (base graphics, ggplot2, lattice), and more are being created (e.g. jjplot). However, despite all the man-hours spent, we still don't have such basic things as TeX integration. In a software package that claims to be the premier graphics solution for a statistician/applied mathematician! The syntax to add formulas to plots is revolting. Even Excel can do better.

All right, rant over. I need to go generate some figures.

California dreaming

dnquark — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 07:53:12 +0000

I come back from California sporting a tie-dyed t-shirt with a peace sign, good Chinese food, bubble tea and Yogurtland soft-serve still having the last of their nutrients being extracted by my system, and many conversations lingering in my mind.

I can still see the faces of my interlocutors and hear fragments of their remarks. Yet when I think harder and try to place those fragments within some sort of a larger context -- one that would paint a more complete picture of the person or convey a self-contained idea -- I get lost. I suppose it's hard to get into people's heads, figure out their beliefs, thoughts, and feelings, and then paint a verbal snapshot. It's doubly hard if you are an 83% I on Meyers-Briggs. Perhaps next time I will try to listen as if I were a journalist seeking a coherent sound bite, or an author trying to develop a character. Then again: the human psyche is an incredibly complex function, full of hidden variables, feedback loops, and nonlinear responses. It takes great talent to accurately sample it and then translate it into words. (Admittedly, if you are a TV journalist, you can always grab a couple of random points and draw a straight line. If you are a Fox journalist, one point is sufficient.) But that all is for next time. Right now I'll be content with whatever verbal and visual snapshots that are still imprinted in my mind.

"...The Western society has completely degraded. Take a look at France -- they are nothing but a banda pidorov. I can't wait to get out of this country." E. proceeded to light a cigarette and talk about the awesome slavic music + electronica parties he throws back in upstate NY. Hanging out with him led to a sharp increase in beer consumption, appreciation for the wealth of practical scientific knowledge chemists seem to harbor, and a touch of jealosy for how easily he picks up girls.

"...Look at those two -- they are like a pilot and the co-pilot." J. pointed at the young Russian prof and the old Russian prof sitting together at a desk in the front of the room. The young one chaired the session. The old one was there largely due to an overbearing feeling of self-importance. "These guys are the assholes in the business class," J. continued, looking at the front few rows. "The rest are sleeping in coach. If it were a real airplane someone would be groping a flight attendant in the back row." He looked at his watch and proceeded to another room, delivering one of his trademark cynical oral presentations to an audience of 15 people, of which five were asleep and five were staring at their laptops. The most impressive thing about J. is that he is a damn good scientist and is quite productive, all the while giving the impression that he doesn't give a shit.

...this post will have to be abbreviated due to our impending arrival into St. Louis. Who knows whether I'll find time to paint any more snapshots -- but I figure I'm doing quite well so far in terms of blog updates anyhow.

Grandma rules, part N

dnquark — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 22:26:52 +0000

She called me to say that she was watching Russian TV, and they were saying that on the internet they have all sorts of harmful sex programs that get people addicted ("I don't know what they are, but they are bad for you. Afterwards they don't know how to deal with real women. Don't watch this, those things are for weak people. I understand, it's hard without a partner around, but don't do it. You just have to finish up grad school and set up your personal life.")
-- "It's pornography, grandma. People used to watch in in magazines and TV; now it's on the internet."
-- "Pornography?.. Oh yes, that's what it's called. No, I think it's different. It used to be pictures and whatnot..."

I never thought that grad school would ruin my life through pornography. It's an interesting angle though.